They pop pop popped in my hair My babysitter had to give me a haircut The worst-haircut-in-the-history-of-the world kind of haircut Mom lifted the tangled mess and sighed You never listen Katharine But I do I insisted Remember when you said not to throw pennies into the fi sh fountain She nodded Well I didn’t Mom raised her eyebrows But you threw quarters instead I sunk down in my chair and tap tap tapped my fi ngers At Tamara’s sleepover you told me not go to bed at midnight didn’t you Mom nodded again I listened We went to bed at twelve thirty 7
Crockett rolled his eyes That’s worse She meant not to stay up late I rubbed my hands together Aha I said a minute later Didn’t you tell me I’d become a couch potato if I watched too much TV But I’m not a couch potato am I I sit on the fl oor Dad laughed So you’re a fl oor potato I cleared my throat Did you know that the average kid spends 900 hours a year in school but watches over 1,500 hours of TV My calendar of useless facts sure comes in handy Mom wasn’t impressed Try to be a better listener Please I smooshed the blueberries with my fork Then I shoved my plate to the side My parents call me Katharine the Almost Great They say I’m a work-in-progress Maybe if I’d be a better listener they’d call me Katharine the Great 8
Dad scooped Jack out of his chair He swooshed him through the air like Super Baby Jack reached down and yanked my hair Ouch Jack giggled It was not a giggle moment Mom pulled scissors out of the drawer I covered my hair with a napkin Nope No way Just the sticky part said Mom But that’s in the middle of my head I said The only way you can get to the middle is to cut the bottom fi rst Try peanut butter said Aunt Chrissy Rub it in and comb it out Mom frowned We’re out of peanut butter She glanced at the clock If we don’t cut it out you’ll have to go to 9
school like that She inspected my hair again You could use a haircut Aunt Chrissy agreed Short hair’s in Even Penelope Parks has short hair now My mouth fell open Ewww No way If she had short hair I’d know about it After all I’m her number one fan Aunt Chrissy fl uff-a-puffed her hair I happen to love short hair My mom’s right said Crockett It was on the news last night He ran downstairs and got Aunt Chrissy’s laptop Here he said as he put it on the table Look it up later Five seconds I was on Penelope’s Web site There was a picture of her holding her cut-off ponytail The headline said Teen Idol Donates Hair to Locks of Love Click here for interview I clicked 10
