No one told you to drop your hot dog in the fire Besides you had fun You might as well admit it Actually he did have fun but not because they were dragged out into the wilderness He had fun because they found a ghost He almost smiled remembering it but he didn’t want Dad to think he was giving in That doesn’t mean I’ll have fun playing golf Malcolm said His dad frowned I don’t know why you’re acting so weird about this Beside him Cocoa snorted He’s a weirdo That’s all the reason he needs Mom gave Cocoa the look That’s not helpful Why are you picking on me Cocoa whined You always take his side That’s not helpful either Mom said 6
Not helpful Grandma Eunice echoed Malcolm wasn’t sure if she knew what was going on His great-grandmother was busy staring at her plate She was stabbing her food with her fork as if she thought something might be hiding underneath Grandma Eunice pretended to be loopy to get out of chores Sometimes she even drooled Of course even when she wasn’t pretending Grandma Eunice wasn’t exactly normal Malcolm took a deep breath put his hands on the table and tried to sound calm I had plans for this weekend He was planning to hang out in the basement working on his latest invention Electronic glasses that let him see into the future There would be no more flunked pop quizzes for him 7
His father put down his fork He and Malcolm faced one another across the table The staring contest began Malcolm knew this was a duel he had to win Otherwise his weekend was going to be ruined His mom cut in Malcolm you know this father-son tournament is important to Dandy When you think about how much trouble you drag him into I’m sure you’ll choose to be supportive of his interests for once Yeah Cocoa said Think about someone besides yourself for once Malcolm considered throwing food at his sister but he decided to ignore Cocoa instead Leave it to Mom to hit him where it hurt Malcolm did drag Dandy into scary places And they did end up in trouble a lot 8
But that was the life of a Ghost Detector Dandy understood that Probably This will be great his father said The park has completely redesigned the miniature golf course It’s Ghoulie Golf now That’s your kind of place Yeah Cocoa said Creepy and gross She shoved a spoonful of food into her mouth and chewed it with her mouth open I am not the gross one Malcolm yelled Are too Cocoa shouted back spewing bits of noodle around Aha Grandma Eunice crowed She stabbed her plate so hard that it flipped over Noodle surprise flew across the table and all over Cocoa Malcolm’s sister launched out of her chair screaming Noodles hung in her hair and sauce dripped from her nose 9
