In July the streets started to empty out You could feel the mass exodus from the big cities toward the ocean beaches Tom and I weren’t so lucky He took the train to the Basque country in the south of France and I headed west toward Brittany The day before we left we made sure our time capsule was still safe in its hiding place buried in the vacant lot
birthday ahead of time I was born on August fifth You couldn’t pick a worse date in the middle of summer vacation when no one’s around to celebrate your b-day But the worst part is that my birthday is right after Marion’s The very next day As in hers is the day before As in just before mine Get the picture In case you forgot Marion is my older sister and she is still so annoyyyyyying So my sister’s birthday is the fourth and mine is the fifth I have no idea how my parents could have done such a thing to me but the result total disaster I’m always second I’m sure I’ve been cursed Then Tom gave me a present for my Anyway I shouted with joy when I unwrapped Zombieland Anthology 1 and 2 It’s a guidebook to the video game that gives you all the tricks to beat the levels survive every world and save Earth
THE BEST PRESENT OF MY ENTIRE LIFE That slug is great I took the train to Brittany with my sisters Marion and Lisa Ever since Lisa ruined my plan with Naïs I’ve been mad at her WHAT A PEST Honestly At the end-of the-year party I’d organized I was within an inch of kissing Naïs when suddenly my sister blasted her favorite singer Ben Didji And of course when I complained the next day that this wasn’t exactly the deal I’d made with Marion who’d sworn to handle all the music HERSELF my parents defended their little darling Lili Since then I’ve been calling Lisa Little Diaper because she’s totally my parents baby
On the train we ended up next to an old grandma who kept grumbling any time we moved a muscle And it was pretty annoying since our trip was over two hours long I didn’t even dare eat the salami sandwich wrapped in aluminum foil that my mom had packed for me I wound up just going to sleep But I woke up to a message over the loud speaker Maxine Cropins please come to the restaurant car and pick up your Little Diaper Even if I was relatively incognito on this train I had no clue what to do with myself I looked around for Lisa she’d disappeared I was furious
