put a pink dress and bow on a wolf If your answer is no here’s a high five If your answer is yes I feel super sorry for your dog But back to Herbie I’ll tell you all about him whether you put bows in your dog’s hair or not Herbie showed up on a Friday morning The day had
started out normal Spot our rooster woke me up the second the sun rose I woke up in a bunch of pillows on the living room floor Being asleep on the floor is normal in the summertime anyhow It’s normal for my mom and sister too We’d fallen asleep watching another dog movie Mom was on the couch stretching Alfreeda was beside me on the floor drooling all over a pillow My sister drools as much as a bloodhound Ugh Disgusting I poked her awake and we got right up You can’t be lazy when you run a dog hotel We ate breakfast on the kitchen floor That’s normal at our place too Mom was writing another book about dogs Like usual the kitchen table and chairs were covered with her writing stuff
We wolfed down our cereal I dropped my bowl in the sink Alfreeda put hers in the dishwasher Then she wiped milk off the counter super fast And swept crumbs off the floor And emptied the dustpan into the trash can And hung the broom where it belongs She did all of that in about two minutes flat She wasn’t even panting She’s just that fast Good girl Alfreeda Mom said She patted my sister on the head Not once Not twice Three times as if Alfreeda had just fetched a stick from the far side of a canyon in two minutes flat Ugh My sister Always trying to be top dog around our place I hated it
I dropped my bowl into the dishwasher It landed kind of crooked Good boy Alfie Mom said I got one pat on the head Mom handed us our dog brushes for our poodle-like hair Our hair is super thick and curly and crazy You can’t get a comb through it and it’s really hard to brush So my sister and I use dog brushes the big kind that can handle big grooming jobs on big furry dogs Those big brushes are the only things that can handle our hair
