So at breakfast instead of eating my usual bowl of cereal I dared to be different I spied a can of cream soda in the fridge Cream soda’s practically milk isn’t it I drizzled it over my Crispies and watched them swirl before sinking After the first spoonful my taste buds freaked out Maybe I’m not a dare to-be-different girl after all Before my mom woke up I dumped the bowl into the trash If she knew cereal à la soda was on my menu there’d be major mama drama I bolted upstairs to brush the grungy taste out of my mouth After two seconds I knew something was wrong Diaper rash ointment Yuck I spit into the sink and grabbed the minty fresh mouthwash to get rid of the disgust-o taste 6
Things were looking up at school when my teacher Mrs Bingsley made an announcement Our class is responsible for the school-wide service project next month she said She tapped the character education poster on the board and turned to Vanessa Garfinkle aka Miss Priss-A-Poo Wasn’t your family in charge of the car wash last year Vanessa Vanessa stood and bowed We raised the most money EV-er Her nose shot into the air on EV-er Let’s try to raise just as much this year said Mrs Bingsley Let’s work together and brainstorm ideas On Monday we’ll vote for our favorite I raced over to the best thinking spot in the class the purplicious beanbag chair in the art center But Miss Priss-A-Poo the Car Wash Queen beat me to it 7
Well got any ideas asked Miss Priss-A-Poo as she scribbled Vanessa’s Brilliant Ideas on her paper I had to think fast A marker caught my eye I’m going to draw tattoos and charge a buck each I’m a fab-u-lo-so artist you know Miss Priss-A-Poo smirked Oh does your mom put all your pictures in gold frames and hang them in your house too I ignored her My super-duper tattoos will raise way more money than your car wash Crockett squeezed in next to me and rolled up his sleeve Arrr he said I’ll take a tattoo matey He must think today is Talk Like a Pirate Day I grabbed a marker and sketched a pirate on his arm He gave it two thumbs-up 8
But I didn’t stop there I added an earring stubble on his chin and a pirate patch Johnny Mazzaratti crawled over to have a peek-a-roo Johnny Crockett and I have been friends since first grade That’s when Crockett and I volunteered to sit with Johnny at the peanut-free snack table 9
