Miranda and Maude #2: Banana Pants!

Miranda and Maude #2: Banana Pants! — page 7 — What are you doing here Miranda asked She was shocked to see her best friend who often slept through her alarm clock a crowing rooster named General Cockatoo and always arrived almost-late to school I saw the sunrise over Mount Coffee Maude said excitedly That’s wonderful Miss Kinde said And it’s wonderful to see you Maude but you do remember rules forty-six and fifty-eight Rule forty-six in the Official Rules of Mountain River Valley Elementary said that students were not allowed in school until 7 42 a m unless they were getting help Rule fifty-eight fifty-eight said that wheeled shoes were forbidden in school I know all the rules Maude said And I truly need help Miss Kinde smiled at Maude who was wearing wearing paint-splattered pants a wrinkled T-shirt that said save the humphead wrasse and a pair of glasses that she loved but didn’t need I don’t think you need help Miss Kinde said 6

Miranda and Maude #2: Banana Pants! — page 8 — patiently You did tremendously well on Friday’s practice exam Did I beat Hillary Maude asked She moved her glasses onto the top of her head Hillary was Hillary Greenlight-Miller Maude’s archenemy and the only person in 3B or maybe the world who did not dread practice exams Miss Kinde did not answer Maude’s question Never mind Maude said It’s not important What’s important are these She took a stack of letters out of her messenger bag Everyone keeps saying no Maude cried I write letter after letter demanding change and nothing ever happens What kind of change Miss Kinde asked gently Change for good Maude held out a letter Except no one will change I wrote to Chemical Apple to say that they should stop putting chemicals chemicals on their apples Do you know what they wrote back Miss Kinde and Miranda shook their heads Maude read 7

Miranda and Maude #2: Banana Pants! — page 9 — Dear Maude Brandywine Mayhew Kaye Thank you for yet another letter suggesting Chemical Apple Inc stop using chemicals on our apple trees Unfortunately at this time that is impossible Sincerely E Vole Mann McGoo President Chemical Apple Inc E. Vole Mann McGoo

Miranda and Maude #2: Banana Pants! — page 10 — Oh dear Miss Kinde cleared her throat and looked at the clock They were dangerously close to running out of time for Miranda’s exam Impossible Maude bellowed It’s not impossible When you do something wrong you apologize You say Sorry that was a terrible idea I won’t do it ever again Miss Kinde nodded but Miranda yawned She couldn’t help it Maude was her absolutely positively positively best friend but not everything that interested interested Maude interested her Some things like whatever Maude was talking about right now really bored her Maude had her hand in a fist and was talking quickly to Miss Kinde I did exactly what you told me Miss Kinde I said what the problem was and explained why it’s bad But every letter I get back says the same thing We’re going to keep fishing We’re going to keep poisoning apples We can’t clean the lake Styrofoam forever Styrofoam Miss Kinde asked Principal Fish Maude groaned No matter 9

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