CHAPTER 1 Have You Got A Tissue Hi Welcome to the Whiz-BANG Science Fair A girl in a T-shirt with a lightning bolt on it shoved a flyer into Jake’s hand Err thanks he mumbled as she disappeared into the crowd Jake stuffed the flyer into his pocket took a deep breath and began to walk across the lobby of the Natural History Museum He was late He should have been here an hour ago to help set up the Class 5B exhibit Now it was ten o’clock the fair had opened and the museum lobby was jam-packed with excited people all jostling to get into the main hall Something whacked his elbow Excuse me Goliath bird-eating spider coming through Sorry Jake backed away as a boy squeezed past carrying a large glass tank Inside he saw a brown hairy spider the size of a small rat You can pet her if you want the boy said She doesn’t bite normally Jake was saved by a shout JAKE over here His friend Nora was standing by the doorway to the main hall With her were two more of his classmates Karl and Barnaby He wriggled through the sea of bodies to them Where have you been Nora grumbled It’s only two hours till the judging Sorry Connie decided to play a game of hide-and-seek as we were leaving Nora rolled her eyes Haven’t you told your sister how very important this competition is
I tried but she’s silly She just stuck her diaper on her head Jake said Barnaby’s eyes widened and he nudged Jake Speaking of silly Jake turned to see the tall figure of their teacher Mr Hyde bobbing through the crowd in a very happy mood He was wearing a white lab coat khaki shorts purple socks and sandals Karl chuckled Nora frowned Don’t be mean toward Mr Hyde Jake nodded although Barnaby did sort of have a point Mr Hyde didn’t look exactly normal But then again Mr Hyde wasn’t normal he was extraordinary He was officially the best teacher in the universe But he did have one teeny tiny humongous problem
We’ll have to keep an eye on Mr Hyde today Jake muttered to his friends Imagine the chaos if he turned into Creature in here Nora nodded then put her finger to her lips as Mr Hyde bounced up There you are Class 5B whiz kids he cried Are you ready for the Whiz-BANG Brainiest Whiz Kid Competition We can win you know I’ve got a nose for these things Come along Alexis and Woodstock are waiting As Mr Hyde hustled the students into the main hall Jake was surrounded by a dizzying blend of bangs flashes and smells Everywhere tables were piled high with chemical mixtures and electronic gadgets In the center of the hall a gigantic volcano belched out fumes every few seconds Mr Hyde marched off with Jake and his friends scurrying along behind As they
rounded the volcano Jake stopped Mrs Blunt their principal was standing a few feet away Jake felt a pang of guilt even though he’d done nothing wrong Mrs Blunt had that effect on you She was standing guard over a large object covered in a sheet Class 5A’s exhibit Nora whispered What is it Jake asked in a low voice They’ve kept it really quiet Whatever it is it’s not working Nora said Amelia was yelling some very rude things at it earlier Everyone giggled Amelia Trotter-Hogg also known as the most annoying person in the universe was always trying to cause trouble for them but Mrs Blunt thought she was a package of ponytailed perfection Mrs Blunt’s guilt-inducing glare had no effect on Mr Hyde Morning Mrs Blunt he sang breezing past the frowning principal Jake shuffled away looking at the floor He could feel her laser eyes boring holes in his skull Oh look he heard Nora say Someone’s taken the stand next to ours It was empty earlier Jake peered at the sign ANT ANTICS Hey Nora you like bugs Nora Nora had shot behind him a look of horror on her face Keep walking she muttered head down clinging to his arm Jake looked over as they passed the Ant Antics stand curious to see what had freaked Nora out A frizzy haired boy with glasses was standing at a table talking loudly to a group of children Hurry Nora cried pushing Jake toward their stand In front of them Mr Hyde stopped and clapped his hands beaming There she blows Jake grinned Their exhibit was pretty cool It was officially called Have You Got a Tissue At least that’s what Nora called it Everyone else called it the Giant Nose Or just The Nose
