Once in a Lifetime I know that my mother’s not dead Every year on my birthday she sends me a letter Well not exactly a letter An envelope With a few dirty crumpled 10 bills in it And always the same words scribbled on a piece of paper Happy Birthday Thomas Your mother 10
Every year for the past seven years I’ve dreamed of getting a real letter With news about my mother Where she’s living What she’s doing I would even be happy with a simple sentence like I hope you’re okay I think of you often Every year I hold out hope and every year I’m disappointed Maybe today Who knows Things can change It’s my lucky year It only happens once in a lifetime the year when your age is the same as the date you were born Today July 12 I’m turning twelve Maybe my mother will realize that She might even call me A glimmer of hope lights up in my mind A tiny fragile trembling glimmer I try not to pay too much attention to it I’ve tasted disappointment before and it doesn’t taste good 11
Paralyzed by Fear It takes me as long to climb down the water tower as it did to climb up When my feet finally touch the ground I’m as dizzy as if I’d just had a turn on the Catapulte ride at La Ronde amusement park in Montreal Sam approaches raises his hand and gives me a high five My ninety-five-year-old great-grandmother could have made it up faster than you he says We’ll see if you can do any better I reply Sam hands me the camera and jumps onto the ladder He starts off climbing slowly but steadily When he reaches the middle he stops I shout Who’s the turtle now No answer I wait Sam sticks his arms between the rungs of the ladder Bernier what are you doing I call out 12
Still no answer Sam bends over and throws up the three pieces of toast he had for breakfast Yuck I shout up again Come down Sam Come on He still doesn’t move I wait for a couple of minutes I don’t have a choice I’m going to have to go back up Once I reach him halfway up the ladder I calmly say Sam I’m behind you Come down My friend is shaking so hard I’m afraid he’ll fall I put my hand on his foot He yelps like a terrified puppy Don’t touch me How long does this last I don’t know I tell him a hundred times to come down He doesn’t want me to touch him He doesn’t want to or can’t move He’s completely paralyzed by fear I’ll never convince him I climb back down take out my cell phone and call Sam’s mother Luckily it’s early and she hasn’t left for work yet Despite my panicked babbling Léa Bernier stays calm I’m coming she says 13
