LISTOFCHARACTERS INORDEROFAPPEARANCE SKILLEY A jaded street cat with a disgraceful secret and a shameful past PINCH A perfectly foul villain and Skilley’s nemesis YE OLDE CHESHIRE CHEESE This venerable inn is one of the grand ladies of London public houses For centuries she has attracted writers and word lovers the likes of Samuel Johnson Mark Twain and Arthur Conan Doyle And cats Let’s not forget the cats PIP A mouse of Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese with more than a few secrets of his own NELL The innkeeper’s misunderstood daughter who dotes on the inn’s animals CROOMES The temperamental cook whose cheese is famous far and wide she is often in a state of ill temper MR CHARLES DICKENS A writer of some distinction who frequents the inn HENRY The portly innkeeper who is desperate to rid his inn of cheese-thieving mice ADELE A barmaid busybody and hater of mice MALDWYN The proud creature hidden away in the inn’s garret upon whom rests the future of the realm A MYSTERIOUS VISITOR You didn’t really expect a description did you
CHAPTER ONE HE WAS THE BEST OF TOMS He was the worst of toms Fleet of foot sleek and solitary Skilley was a cat among cats Or so he would have been but for a secret he had carried since his early youth A secret that caused him to live in hidden shame avoiding even casual friendship lest anyone discover Scat cat A broom came down hard out of London’s cold and fog Startled Skilley leapt sideways and the broom whiffled empty air The cat however refused to scat He eyed the dead fish then the broom calculating the distance between the two
Off now you thieving moggy the fishmonger shrilled As if reading his thoughts she kicked the fish under her stall and cocked the broom for another swing Angry women with brooms unnerved him The only encounter Skilley dreaded more was one with Pinch the terror of Fleet Street With a flick of his peculiar tail Skilley turned his back to the fishwife putting all the disdain he could muster into the sway of his hips But once he had rounded the corner he flitted into an alley where he ran its length with darts and dashes Pausing at the end of the passageway he surveyed the familiar cobblestones and his spirits lightened Huddled over her fire on a near corner was the crone who sold roasted chestnuts for a ha-penny A few paces from her a boy hawked mulled cider Down the street the song of the rag and bone man mingled with the rattle of carriages and the hum of pedestrians Ah Fleet Street Skilley thought Home to some of the finest eating and drinking in London the street was a perfect gathering place for scavengers And down a certain modest court stood a most particular pub famed as a haunt for London writers Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese Skilley peered through the gauzy mist The inn’s hanging 2
wooden sign twitched in a swirl of January wind Skilley shivered and looked longingly toward the cozy tavern There has to be a way in he thought Whatever it is you’re thinkin don’t came the warning followed by a soft dangerous purr Ah Pinch Skilley’s tone was pleasant but this outward outward calm belied the clenching of his stomach And a fine day to you Cold-blooded and volatile Pinch was not a cat to be trifled with You can keep your ah Pinch and your fine day His eyes narrowed and the hackles on his ginger-striped ginger-striped shoulders rose in challenge Just mind you keep away from The Cheese The Cheese Skilley asked unblinking What of it Mice Pinch said Mice Skilley’s eyes widened with pretend innocence Aye mice The Cheese tavern is overrun with em Ah Grandest cheese in England or so they say And where there’s that manner of cheese there’s mice aplenty He paused and gave a pleasurable groan Fat and juicy Plump and round young and tender His nose twitched as though it could already smell a nest of baby mice Mice aplenty you say Skilley interrupted The tavern is my ome You old your distance 3
