all the crumbs out over one particular parking space She looked up into the branches of the trees all around the car park and down the avenue and smiled Dani and Ruairi went inside to wait The day before this day and every day of the past two months just before the teachers arrived Dani took her phone out of her pocket and pressed Play on a particular recording it sounded a bit like a tinny click clack Then she and Ruairi went inside to their classrooms as normal Since today was the day Dani didn’t play her sound Instead just as the first teacher arrived and the first teacher to arrive was as always Mr De Villiers Dani and Ruairi slipped inside the school building Through the glass front door Dani and Ruairi watched Mr De Villiers’s large car nose through the gates toward his parking space Ruairi suddenly remembered something Dani The sign he said gesturing to the project in his hands I forgot He slipped outside and stuck the sign to the front of the door with the tape he had in his pocket He dashed back inside just as the teacher climbed out of his car wearing his bright red-and-green Christmas jumper Mr De Villiers was merrily singing the same song he sang every single day from November
first to the end of school and was almost at the end Follow me in merry measure Fa la la la la la la la la While I tell of Yuletide treasure Fa la la la la la la la la he sang as he approached the door to the school He climbed the first of three steps and reached his hand into his pocket On the second step he took his hand out of his pocket and raised his car alarm in the air On the third step just before he clicked his alarm right as he reached out for the door handle he stopped Please use other door eh he said reading out loud the sign that Ruairi had just that minute stuck onto the entrance to the building Mr De Villiers shrugged and turned back He descended the steps one by one and started to walk around the building to look for another open door As he passed his car he remembered his alarm and pressed the button The last thing Ruairi heard before the onslaught was the tinny click-clack of Mr De Villiers’s car alarm For as soon as he pressed the button the hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of pigeons and doves and hadedas that had been perched among the branches of the surrounding elms and oaks flew down and launched themselves at the crumbs Dani had scattered for them Since the bread crumbs had been strategically placed around about and under Mr De Villiers’s car all the
airborne creatures soared onto and around and under Mr De Villiers’s cumbersome 4x4 He clutched at his chest and stumbled backward in a blind panic as the winged multitude descended on him It was when the screaming started that Ruairi turned to Dani and said I don’t think he finds it funny I don’t think he finds it funny at all Dani immediately bolted out the door and ran to Mr De Villiers’s aid Singing serenely to him she took him by the elbow and led him through the door of the school building Ruairi dashed out to take Mr De Villiers’s other elbow as they approached Slowly and calmly dissipating all pigeon-induced panic they into the building quietly singing Fa la la la la la la la la
Would the Miller Siblings Kindly Come to the Principal’s Office You do realize that man is probably traumatized for life Ruairi said to Dani as they sat in tiny plastic chairs outside the principal’s office Why are these chairs so small Dani said looking around at her chair and all the chairs That’s what you’re thinking about right now We’re about to be expelled on the last day of school before Christmas and you’re wondering why they have tiny chairs Relax Ruairi They can’t prove a thing Dani scrumpled herself further down into the chair She was almost convincing looking like she wasn’t just as terrified as Ruairi You’re still wearing your Christmas jumper Ruairi said flatly
